Kinky Kollege Consent Violation Procedure

Managed by the KK Ethics Committee

Last Updated: April 3, 2025

Reporting a Consent Violation

Reporting Disclaimer: Why We Don’t Accept Anonymous or Third-Party Reports

At Kinky Kollege, we take all reports of consent violations seriously and are committed to addressing them with care, fairness, and accountability. To uphold these values, we require that all reports come directly from the person who experienced the violation. We do not accept anonymous or third-party (hearsay) reports.

Why?

  • Accuracy matters. To assess a situation thoroughly and fairly, we need to hear directly from the person affected. Secondhand accounts often lack key details or context, and may unintentionally misrepresent the experience.
  • Consent and agency. It is important that individuals have full control over how their experiences are shared. Investigating a report without someone’s consent to do so can be disempowering or even retraumatizing.
  • Respecting due process. To uphold fairness for all involved, including the person being reported, we need to gather information directly from the source. This ensures a clear, fact-based process.

How to Report:

  • During the event: Speak to any clearly marked KK Security Staff, Dungeon Monitor, or Safety Lead to be directed to a trained Ethics Committee member. Or, speak to an Ethics Committee member directly. Ethics committee members can be easily identified at the event by a badge ribbon attached to their KK Badges which designates them as an official KK Ethics Committee member.
  • Outside the event: Email kk.ethicscommittee@gmail.com, or reach out to the KK Ethics Committee’s Official FetLife Account. You will receive a confirmation within 72 hours.

What we ask: Reporters will be asked for the following information:

  • Preferred contact method, name, and pronouns
  • Description of the incident and who was involved
  • Any prior negotiation or communication around the activity
  • Use of safewords and whether they were ignored
  • Any injuries or medical attention required
  • Whether this has happened before with the same person
  • Names of potential witnesses
  • Supporting documentation (e.g., screenshots, written messages, photos of injuries)
  • What outcome they hope for

See Something? Say Something.

If you witness something concerning or believe someone may have experienced harm, we encourage you to check in with them and let them know how to report it if they choose to do so. You are also welcome to share your observations with our Ethics Committee, but please understand that without a report from the person affected, our ability to take formal action will be limited.

Timeliness is important.

We’ll always do our best with the information we receive, but the sooner a report is made, the more effectively we can follow up. Waiting too long may make it harder to collect details, witness accounts, or take meaningful action.

Our goal is not to avoid responsibility, but to ensure that the process is thoughtful, respectful, and centered on the person most impacted.

If you have questions or concerns, please email kk.ethicscommittee@gmail.com, or reach out to the KK Ethics Committee’s Official FetLife Account.

Initial Review and Crisis Support

  • If the reporter is in distress, the Ethics Committee will help them connect with a kink-aware crisis line or trauma resources. Their mental well-being comes first.
  • If there is immediate danger, staff may involve medical or emergency services at the event, including calling 911 or ambulatory services if necessary.

Investigation Process

1. Neutral Investigator Assigned: A member (or members) of the Ethics Committee who has/have no personal connection to the individuals involved will act as the Inquirer(s). The Inquirer will:

  • Remain neutral and fact-focused;
  • Meet separately with the reporter, the accused, and any direct witnesses; and
  • Request relevant materials or follow-up questions.

2. Confidentiality and Boundaries:

  • No attempt will be made to bring the parties together or encourage mediation.
    • If mediation is requested, the Ethics Committee will refer both parties to appropriate resources. The Ethics Committee is not trained in mediation, and we do not want to unintentionally cause harm attempting to do so.
  • The reported individual will not receive a copy of the report. However, they will be made aware of the allegations made against them and will have a chance to present their side.
  • The Ethics Committee will maintain confidentiality throughout the process by avoiding use of names or identifying information.
  • Committee members must recuse themselves if they have a conflict of interest (e.g., partner, metamour, ex, play partner, etc.).

3. Temporary Restrictions: While the investigation is ongoing, KK may:

  • Temporarily suspend the reported individual from events or online spaces
  • Remove them from volunteer, presenter, or leadership duties until resolution

Evaluation Criteria

The Ethics Committee will assess each case individually, with attention to:

  • Severity and nature of the alleged violation
  • Whether informed consent was discussed and understood
  • Use of coercion, manipulation, or abuse of power
  • Whether the accused acknowledges harm and shows willingness to grow
  • Any prior reports, bans, or documented concerns about the individual
  • Risk to community safety or well-being

Possible Sanctions

After the Ethics Committee completes its review, they will present their findings and inform the KK Board of the sanctions being imposed (if any). Sanctions may include:

  1. Warning & Education:
    1. For unintentional violations or miscommunications
    2. Individual receives education and must adjust behavior
  1. Restricted Attendance:
    1. Temporary ban from some or all KK events for a defined time period
    2. May require evidence of behavior change before returning
  1. Full Ban:
    1. Permanent exclusion from all KK events and affiliated spaces
    2. May be communicated to nearby events or organizations discreetly
  1. Role Removal
    1. Individuals in volunteer, teaching, or board positions may be suspended or removed if found in violation
  2. Knowingly making false reports may also result in appropriate sanctions.

Notification of Outcome

  1. The Reporter will be notified first. If they seek further resolution (e.g., professional mediation), KK can refer them to appropriate support.
  2. The Reported Person will be informed of the outcome, required boundaries, or restrictions. They will not be allowed to contact the reporter.
  3. Witnesses will be asked to maintain confidentiality unless the reporter gives permission to speak.
  4. In Case of a Ban:
    1. KK may notify organizers at similar events about the ban without naming the reporter.
    2. A short public statement may be made if the person was a visible volunteer or presenter (e.g., “X has stepped back from responsibilities”).

Confidentiality and Respect

  • KK does not publicly discuss consent investigations.
  • KK staff will not disclose specifics to friends, partners, or bystanders.
  • Naming names or sharing details of the process is not permitted on event grounds or in official KK spaces.
  • All members of the Ethics Committee are expected to uphold confidentiality beyond their term of service.

Ongoing Commitment

This procedure may evolve to better serve our community. We welcome feedback and remain committed to transparency, growth, and justice. Our goal is not just to respond to harm, but to reduce the conditions in which it can occur.

The Kinky Kollege board members would like to acknowledge and thank National Coalition of Sexual Freedom for their reference materials that assisted in the creation of this updated consent violation procedure.

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